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Today's Vipers View is brought

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to you by Fags.

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And I love the thought of

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coming home to Fags.

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Even if I know they cause

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cancer.

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On my own.

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Quick glance here at the Fifty

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Shades Darker movie.

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Against the wall.

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Top off.

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Down below.

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She's on the way out, look.

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There's a twist.

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She's left him.

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She looks like she'd bollock

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you.

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Sponsored by Audi.

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What?

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We rewind there and see the

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state of that helicopter green

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screen.

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Terrible.

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It's out Valentine's Day anyway

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if you want to waste a tenner.

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And that's the lady who writes

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the books.

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Vipers.

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On the campaign trail.

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My wife and I.

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Are small.

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Represent.

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Tiny people.

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Non-deplorable people.

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Ah.

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I am a wife.

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I am a wife.

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I spent 85 years in public

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education.

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What?

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Combined.

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Combined as principal.

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Aye.

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Combined.

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Right.

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I thought he meant he was still

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in school.

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The poor old sausage.

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On the campaign trail.

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Old Hillary Clinton was at New

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York there the other day for

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the 9-11 thing.

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And wasn't she pissed?

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And people.

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They were trying to hide it.

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The people around her.

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Nobody wanted to see her fall.

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A bit like building seven.

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But it reminded me of when I

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took a trip to New York with my

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family.

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Back when I was only a nipper.

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Look ma'am.

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There she is.

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The World Trade Center.

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How much?

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$14.

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We're only in the car for two

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minutes.

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The windows look nice.

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Look at the guard mammy.

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He's very fat.

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Wow.

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Look at how big they are.

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Jesus Christ.

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I thought that bird was a plane.

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And that one.

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Imagine that.

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Chinese trains.

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Train stations in China are

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awful tidy aren't they?

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Not like the ones in England.

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Which are full of pigeons and

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piss.

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Once on board the Chinese train

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we are treated to Chimbo.

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Who plays the Ocarina of Time.

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Poor Chimbo.

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All smiles on board the engine.

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Look at that.

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Some lad with a bloody iPad.

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No matter where you go there's

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always an i-wank ready to catch

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the unremarkable.

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i-wank.

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This is iPhone 7.

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Yeah how much is it?

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It makes all the things you do

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with your iPhone better.

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What's it cost?

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And more powerful.

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That doesn't look like where I

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live.

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It's the best iPhone we've ever

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made.

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Yeah how much is the phone?

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Glad.

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Okay you're not going to tell

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me how much.

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I wonder why.

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Let's have a look.

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Come on.

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What?

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779.

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Or 919 euro.

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For a fucking phone.

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Two.

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Observation deck.

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I'd like to go to the

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observation deck with that

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woman mammy.

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She looks nice.

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Wow.

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The buildings are huge.

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They're like two fingers

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sticking up.

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Fuck you poor people.

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We're the best.

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I don't think it would wind

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anyone up.

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Japanese trains.

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All aboard.

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The Thomas the Tank Engine

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Express.

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Over in Japan.

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What will they think of next?

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Look at the happy families on

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back of the caboose.

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Here he comes.

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Jeez he's going at some speed.

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Where's the family?

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Where's the family?

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Oh my god they must be dead.

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Why?

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Anmio.

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No.

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Anmio.

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Why did it have to happen?

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Anmio.

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No.

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Come anmio.

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you

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you

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you

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you

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you

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you