1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:02,510 *Bust out the yoga mat. And 2 00:00:02,510 --> 00:00:05,230 then bust out the boobs. It's 3 00:00:05,230 --> 00:00:07,760 the new craze taken America by 4 00:00:07,760 --> 00:00:10,000 storm. Breastfeeding yoga. 5 00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:12,380 Finding something that you love 6 00:00:12,380 --> 00:00:15,360 to do. Oh yeah? Draw, paint, 7 00:00:15,360 --> 00:00:16,950 exercise. Are you gonna vote 8 00:00:16,950 --> 00:00:18,790 Hillary are you? Binge watch 9 00:00:18,790 --> 00:00:20,420 Netflix. Whatever makes you 10 00:00:20,420 --> 00:00:22,520 happy. I know what makes that 11 00:00:22,520 --> 00:00:25,000 baby happy. Huh? Am I right? 12 00:00:25,000 --> 00:00:28,000 The Diddy. 13 00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:30,000 *Dial Bears* 14 00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:31,410 White is right. Too many 15 00:00:31,410 --> 00:00:32,900 immigrants coming into our 16 00:00:32,900 --> 00:00:34,900 country. Keep the Arctic white. 17 00:00:34,900 --> 00:00:36,000 White is right. 18 00:00:36,000 --> 00:00:37,430 Polar icecats might be melting, 19 00:00:37,430 --> 00:00:38,800 but when these immigrants come 20 00:00:38,800 --> 00:00:40,080 into our country mate, we're 21 00:00:40,080 --> 00:00:41,000 not gonna melt. 22 00:00:41,000 --> 00:00:42,000 White is right. 23 00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:43,570 Get your hands off me. Don't 24 00:00:43,570 --> 00:00:45,390 touch me. Don't touch me. What 25 00:00:45,390 --> 00:00:47,210 are you f***ing chaining me for? 26 00:00:47,210 --> 00:00:48,000 You dick. 27 00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:50,600 *Baddy*, Maddy, Maddy, tell 28 00:00:50,600 --> 00:00:52,770 Darren I've been nicked. I'll 29 00:00:52,770 --> 00:00:54,000 be home later. 30 00:00:54,000 --> 00:00:56,000 *Dial Bears* 31 00:00:56,000 --> 00:00:58,000 *Dial Bears* 32 00:00:58,000 --> 00:01:00,000 *Dial Bears* 33 00:01:00,000 --> 00:01:02,000 *Dial Bears* 34 00:01:02,000 --> 00:01:03,000 *Dial Bears* 35 00:01:03,000 --> 00:01:04,000 *Dial Bears* 36 00:01:04,000 --> 00:01:05,000 *Dial Bears* 37 00:01:05,000 --> 00:01:06,670 Brave scenes from Her Majesty's 38 00:01:06,670 --> 00:01:08,000 police force this week. 39 00:01:08,000 --> 00:01:09,000 *Dial Bears* 40 00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:10,840 as one heroic officer took it 41 00:01:10,840 --> 00:01:12,420 upon himself to rescue a 42 00:01:12,420 --> 00:01:13,980 passenger from a car. 43 00:01:15,800 --> 00:01:16,940 Get out of the car! 44 00:01:17,200 --> 00:01:18,340 And it's the kind of police 45 00:01:18,340 --> 00:01:20,060 work we don't see very often. 46 00:01:20,220 --> 00:01:21,520 Bloody heroes they are. 47 00:01:22,160 --> 00:01:23,300 Get in the car now! 48 00:01:24,860 --> 00:01:26,170 Here we have the Merry Pisshead 49 00:01:26,170 --> 00:01:29,620 from 1698, which is a long time 50 00:01:29,620 --> 00:01:32,300 ago, by Ernest Van Huygens. 51 00:01:32,620 --> 00:01:33,860 And would you look at the way 52 00:01:33,860 --> 00:01:35,370 he's managed to capture the 53 00:01:35,370 --> 00:01:37,200 window reflection on the little 54 00:01:37,200 --> 00:01:37,920 goblet. 55 00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:39,160 That's good drawing. 56 00:01:39,820 --> 00:01:40,770 And then would you look at the 57 00:01:40,770 --> 00:01:42,030 way he's captured the 58 00:01:42,030 --> 00:01:43,910 reflection on his little nose, 59 00:01:43,910 --> 00:01:44,780 because he's an alcoholic. 60 00:01:45,020 --> 00:01:45,620 That's good drawing. 61 00:01:45,920 --> 00:01:47,520 And this is a cheeky little 62 00:01:47,520 --> 00:01:48,920 piece, isn't it? 63 00:01:48,940 --> 00:01:49,830 Because you just look at him 64 00:01:49,830 --> 00:01:50,400 and he's going, 65 00:01:50,520 --> 00:01:54,400 Eww, Eww, Eww, Eww. 66 00:01:54,760 --> 00:01:57,440 Let's go over to Oktoberfest. 67 00:01:57,560 --> 00:01:59,520 And we're here at the Oktoberfest. 68 00:02:00,060 --> 00:02:01,560 It's pissing down, but people 69 00:02:01,560 --> 00:02:03,250 are still pretending to have 70 00:02:03,250 --> 00:02:03,740 fun. 71 00:02:04,580 --> 00:02:05,370 And we have a Merry Pisshead 72 00:02:05,370 --> 00:02:05,980 there. 73 00:02:06,400 --> 00:02:08,360 And some beautiful young ladies 74 00:02:08,360 --> 00:02:09,380 on the piss. 75 00:02:09,940 --> 00:02:10,800 Jolly men. 76 00:02:11,480 --> 00:02:12,580 Though that's a woman, I do 77 00:02:12,580 --> 00:02:13,320 apologise. 78 00:02:13,840 --> 00:02:14,980 The Germans, of course, take 79 00:02:14,980 --> 00:02:16,680 great pleasure in celebrating 80 00:02:16,680 --> 00:02:18,660 life through the medium of booze. 81 00:02:19,160 --> 00:02:20,610 Although there is a dark side 82 00:02:20,610 --> 00:02:21,860 to the Germans. 83 00:02:22,280 --> 00:02:24,760 Behind the cardigans, hats, 84 00:02:24,760 --> 00:02:27,480 livestock and delicious beer 85 00:02:27,480 --> 00:02:29,980 lies a tapestry of nightmares. 86 00:02:29,980 --> 00:02:33,060 This is World War II news. 87 00:02:33,440 --> 00:02:35,400 Dispatches as they were brought 88 00:02:35,400 --> 00:02:37,540 to you during World War II. 89 00:02:37,540 --> 00:02:40,690 Earlier today, a plane landed 90 00:02:40,690 --> 00:02:42,080 in a field. 91 00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:44,840 And we weren't sure as to who 92 00:02:44,840 --> 00:02:46,860 it was because everything is so 93 00:02:46,860 --> 00:02:48,080 bloody messy. 94 00:02:48,080 --> 00:02:52,300 But we think it was an ally. 95 00:02:52,460 --> 00:02:53,080 It could have been German 96 00:02:53,080 --> 00:02:53,440 though. 97 00:02:53,500 --> 00:02:56,740 November 24th, 1941. 98 00:02:57,520 --> 00:02:59,190 Tanks were firing shite 99 00:02:59,190 --> 00:03:00,820 everywhere. 100 00:03:01,040 --> 00:03:01,380 Fire. 101 00:03:01,560 --> 00:03:04,760 the fire breathing tanks and 102 00:03:04,760 --> 00:03:07,950 men were running around it's 103 00:03:07,950 --> 00:03:12,210 not nice. Refugees are taking 104 00:03:12,210 --> 00:03:14,120 IQ tests now so that they 105 00:03:14,120 --> 00:03:15,800 integrate into the working 106 00:03:15,800 --> 00:03:18,480 world. Here's one of the tests. 107 00:03:18,480 --> 00:03:20,730 Choose the key. Looks primitive 108 00:03:20,730 --> 00:03:22,700 but I'm sure there's more to it 109 00:03:22,700 --> 00:03:25,140 than meets the eye. You'd hope. 110 00:03:25,140 --> 00:03:27,290 And on to level 2 now. Choose 111 00:03:27,290 --> 00:03:29,000 the key again. 112 00:03:30,280 --> 00:03:31,830 I'm sorry but what kind of jobs 113 00:03:31,830 --> 00:03:33,200 is this Refugee game gonna 114 00:03:33,200 --> 00:03:34,950 unlock exactly? It's time for a 115 00:03:34,950 --> 00:03:36,620 bollockin'. Well what time is 116 00:03:36,620 --> 00:03:38,240 it? I'll tell you what time it 117 00:03:38,240 --> 00:03:40,270 is. It's time for a bollockin'. 118 00:03:40,270 --> 00:03:41,780 Anders Breakfast, or whatever 119 00:03:41,780 --> 00:03:43,150 the fuck his name is over in 120 00:03:43,150 --> 00:03:44,640 Norwegians, lives in a cosy 121 00:03:44,640 --> 00:03:46,330 little gaff like that. I was on 122 00:03:46,330 --> 00:03:47,900 daft the other day looking for 123 00:03:47,900 --> 00:03:49,390 a fucking place like that. 124 00:03:49,390 --> 00:03:51,200 Couldn't get one for money. He's 125 00:03:51,200 --> 00:03:52,760 been paid to live over there, 126 00:03:52,760 --> 00:03:54,230 the monster man is. He's been 127 00:03:54,230 --> 00:03:55,930 suing Norway now because he's 128 00:03:55,930 --> 00:03:57,770 not being treated like a human. 129 00:03:57,770 --> 00:03:59,580 Listen. He should have been put 130 00:03:59,580 --> 00:04:00,000 to Bobo's. 131 00:04:00,000 --> 00:04:02,060 I was a long time ago. There's 132 00:04:02,060 --> 00:04:03,650 no bout of doubt. I was 133 00:04:03,650 --> 00:04:06,020 visiting a cousin over in Nuremberg 134 00:04:06,020 --> 00:04:07,700 there the other day and he 135 00:04:07,700 --> 00:04:09,620 brought us along to a rally by 136 00:04:09,620 --> 00:04:11,300 the Prime Minister or the 137 00:04:11,300 --> 00:04:13,630 President or whoever he is. I'm 138 00:04:13,630 --> 00:04:15,760 not sure but I tell you this. 139 00:04:15,760 --> 00:04:17,820 He can hold a crowd. He was a 140 00:04:17,820 --> 00:04:20,140 very angry man. He seemed to be 141 00:04:20,140 --> 00:04:22,110 a very angry man but they all 142 00:04:22,110 --> 00:04:23,240 loved him.